Hi-eft

Coaching YOU for YOUR Best New Year in 2008

Ask yourself with gentleness and patience, “In my heart of hearts, what do I really want?”

Be still, wait, listen and honour the answers that come.   

It may be a while before you hear the truest answer, which often speaks on a very quiet, almost imperceptible voice.   However you will know it when you hear it.

And the answer may be different from the life you are leading.  That’s okay.  Simply live with this new insight and follow where it beckons.

WHEN you have the answer THEN you can:

1. Decide what you want for your FUTURE;
2. Stake your claim;
3. Having a goal or vision will give your life direction, purpose and passion.

So in 2008 - WAIT and LISTEN to what clicks with you

Christina Elvin

Here’s some Christmas Crackers for after dinner

Just when you thought it was safe to relax after Christmas dinner ....  try these out  he-he-he

1. Ask someone to say:

SILK SILK SILK very quickly

Now ask them:

WHAT DO COWS DRINK?

Think about the answer they give - very carefully  …

2. I made myself a snowball as perfect as can be

I thought I’d keep it as a pet and let it sleep with me.

I made it some pyjamas and a pillow for its head

Then last night it ran away but first … it wet the bed!

Christina Elvin

Uncovering Your Goals – Do You Know Where You Are Going?

We know we all have goals of one type or another – just look at New Year’s Eve and see how many are set then. 

However – by 1^st February, how many people are still on track to achieving them?

Only about 25%  - and are you in that 25%? Chances are the answer is “No!”

So what can you do to keep yourself on track to achieving your goals?

Well, when setting YOUR  goals you can ask yourself these questions:

Whose Goals Are They?  Am I going for MY own goals OR goals set for me by OTHERS?

Christina Elvin

Do we recognise our 'identity' issues? - or in other words - That we've lost our 'sparkle'?

Recently I went to a celebration evening, which involved eating and talking with like-minded people - or so I thought!

I was 'sandwiched' between 2 individuals who both had problems, one 'slice' had recently lost her mother - grieving is a natural process and her 'talk' was about moving through this process. She recognised this process and just needed to be able to talk through it - no problems, this is my bread and butter work, so I was happy to oblige.

However, the other 'slice' had a problem which stretched back several years and it was a serious health problem - which was under control (thank goodness) medically. Well this 'slice' simply couldn't separate herself from her 'problem' - in fact it WAS her 'identity'.  Her life existed BEFORE the problem began yet all she could talk about was how limiting it had made her.  And she has been like this ever since her 'problem' started.

So whilst talking solemnly about her limitations - ie what she couldn't do (which to be honest was not a lot provided she had some assistance) she 'enjoyed' talking about ALL the activities she had been doing recently (and one suspects she had been doing on and off since her 'problem' began).

One of these activities included having to leave a special 'dinner party' earlier than other guests, at midnight!! I would have been dropping asleep at 10pm - and I told her so.  To be honest they had agreed to 'ferry' another couple home and stayed on later than she really wanted because she didn't want to let them down.  She did eventually leave earlier than them because her illness was making it extremely uncomfortable for her to stay there - which was a very good reason to leave - yet she 'suffered' in agony for several hours before leaving. The others at the dinner party partied on, unaware of her agony, until the very small hours of the morning.

This person did have to retire from a job (she very much enjoyed) early - due to ill health - and retired on a not-insubstantial amount of money, so didn't have many financial problems to contend with - which is something that often turns a bad situation into an extremely bad situation.  So no problems there, and yes her mobility is limited (she isn't as mobile and agile as she used to be, and can't drive now) - however she has friends who visit her, take her out, keep in touch with her and she does get out socially - lots of positive things to be thankful for.  And she does enjoy her life as best she can - she goes away on holidays and treats herself.  Yet she focusses mainly on 'her problem' - perhaps without her problem she feels she isn't important.  She is a lovely person, and has done lots of super things in her life, however all that seems eclipsed by 'her problem'.

There are probably many people in the world who do not realise they are re-creating themselves in the guise of 'their problem' be it an illness, a lost opportunity, a lost relationship, being badly done to - I know because I have been there, done that, have the tee-shirt and needed to work through it myself - and eventually I believe I have.  I am NOT my 'problem', I AM a super person who has 'problems' crop up in her life that maybe takes me by surprise - and I am not unique in this. 

'Problems' crop up in everyone's life from time to time and some people seem to sail through them, whilst others get stuck at times and then move on, and others, unfortunately, 'identify' with these 'problems' - and 'it' becomes 'them'.  And they don't notice it!  They don't notice they've lost that 'sparkle' which is their unique essence which makes them unique and wonderful.

So let's be thankful when we meet people like that - for then we notice we are not like that - there for the grace of ......

All the best

Christina Elvin